Chapter Thirty Six - Lover

I had lost count of the number of red cups I'd grabbed after that aggravating seven minutes in heaven. I think four, at least.

But I only had Meera and Chad to blame. They hadn't stopped me. Instead, they'd encouraged me to drink more and even joined in on the fun a couple of times.

And we all did end up playing hide and seek after all, which brings me to the reason why I had gone for my most recent drink. What I had said to Matt had been eating at me, especially now that I was drunk. When I was sober, the anger was atop any other emotion, but the drunk me could feel nothing but guilt.

So naturally, I'd tried to talk to him. When Chris had started to gather people for hide and seek, I'd seen him walking across the campsite. Our eyes had met, and with a relieved smile, I'd started walking towards him but to my surprise, he'd turned his back on me and started off in the opposite direction, completely ignoring me.

"Matt," I'd called, having taken barely two steps after him when I'd seen Rebecca in the distance talking to her minions. Upon seeing him, she'd cut the gossip abruptly, ran up to him, and picked a conversation.

And he'd freaking replied to her.

That was when I'd grabbed the silly red cup off the silly table and downed its silly contents in a go.

I realized it was my pattern more than my anger. Once I started drinking, I did not want to stop until I was wasted because what was the point of drinking if you didn't even feel just a little bit numb and... floaty?

"What's wrong with you?" Meera frowned at me.

I'd been walking in silence while she'd been ranting about how drunk Chad would rather eat cup noodles than play hide and seek with her. Poor guy was exhausted, everyone was, so I didn't blame him.

Mid rant, Meera had realized I was quiet, and after observing me for a few seconds, she'd thrown the question.

I wrapped my arms around myself and gave a little shrug. "Nothing."

"You're not..." she slurred, eyes rolling to the back of her head for a moment. "...yourself. I mean, I barely see the normal you...this silent, let alone the drunk you."

"It's nothing."

"Spill, bitch!"

I pressed my lips together, then exhaled. "I feel bad."

"About?"

"Just something I said."

"To?"

I cut a glance at her. It was dark, so her face wasn't very clear. It also reminded me what we were doing—finding a spot to hide in the woods. I wondered if the seeker was looking already.

"Shouldn't we be hiding first?"

Meera stopped walking, bringing her hands to her hips stubbornly. "I don't give a rat's ass about getting caught in hide and seek."

I sighed, lost my balance for a moment over a stone, then steadied myself.

"Matt," I exhaled.

Instantly, her facial expressions shifted. The frown on her face morphed into a big smile as her eyes lit up like I'd told her something exciting and not the reason for my distress. Some best friend she is.

"Aw Becks! Are you sad about getting your lover mad at you?"

I held up an index finger. "Hey! He's not my lo—" I stopped abruptly, thought for a second, and shrugged. Sounds nice. "Yes, I got him mad."

She stepped forward and pinched my cheeks, pouting. "You're a lover, too."

I smacked her hand away, taking a step away from her. "I'm not."

She burst out laughing, and I rolled my eyes, pushing her behind a boulder. It was big enough to hide us both, but since she'd annoyed me, I aggressively marched a little away and hid behind a giant tree instead, her laughter still echoing in the woods.

"Shut up," I snapped. "You're gonna get us both caught."

"Right," she sputtered, her laugh slowly subsiding. "But just out of curiosity, what did you say to him?"

That he means nothing to me. Biggest lie I'd ever told.

"Can we talk about this later? You know when we don't have to scream and risk someone hearing us?"

"Sure. Whatever you say, lover girl."

I let out a groan and threw my head against the tree trunk, then glowered as the rough surface prickled my scalp and stepped away from it. I sat down against the tree and sulked in silence. First, I got my enemy mad, then I got myself sad over it, then I got my best friend teasing me over it. What the fuck is wrong with everyone?

I don't know for how many minutes I sat there. I only realized it had been long enough when I woke up with a start. I had dozed off.

Blinking furiously, I looked around and panicked for a moment until I remembered why I was in the middle of the woods alone. We were playing hide and seek. Chris was the seeker. And he had said if he hadn't found us in twenty minutes, he'd obviously forgotten about us. So, we could come back to the campsite.

I got up, wiped the dust off my jeans and started to saunter towards the campsite, surprised that I made it without getting lost. Most of the people were back and just as I made it to my tent, Chris came back too, followed by three people. So, the game was over.

Yawning, I walked inside my tent and eyed the stuff in there.

"This is not my bag," I muttered, turning a circle in my spot. "So, this is not my tent."

I snuck out of it, thankful nobody saw me trespassing in their tent and entered the next one, grinning when I located my bag. "Yep. That's the one."

I grabbed my water bottle and took a sip, then almost spit out the water upon remembering something.

Meera!

I frantically stepped out, looking for her among the people. She wasn't there.

"Shit!"

Without a second thought, I turned my flashlight on and made a beeline for the woods. The trees were all the same but somehow, I remembered we'd went around the lake before so I took the same path, turning several times until I came across the boulder.

Just like I'd thought, there she was, sleeping with her back against the giant rock, her head hanging low between her shoulders and her legs stretched out in front of her.

"Meera." I tried to shake her shoulder gently but ended up using force and pushing her to the ground.

She came about with a gasp and sat up again, looking around. "Did we just get caught?"

"Oh my God!" I fell to the ground next to her and burst out laughing. "No. The game's been over for a while. We're too good of hiders to be found."

A proud smile fell on her lips as she went back to lying on the ground and shut her eyes. "Great!"

"No!" I shook her again. "We need to go back now. We're in the woods."

Her eyes snapped open and started taking in our dark surroundings. "Oh."

"Yes. Come on." I got up and held out my hand for her. Without putting too much weight on her injured foot, she got up and wiped the dust off the back of her pants.

"Where did we come from?"

"Over there." I pointed towards a tree, then looked at the other one as my brows pulled together. "Or maybe from there."

"I think from there." She pointed towards a third direction.

"All I know is we need to find the lake. I found it before. I can do it again."

"Let's go, captain. I'm right behind you." She threw me a salute and started walking, and I started to follow her with a fierce nod.

"Is this the lake?" She pointed upwards just five seconds into our march.

I glared at her. "No. It's the sky."

"I know. Just messing with you."

We stared at each other. Then we burst out laughing. It slowly subsided, but then I looked at her, and we burst into another fit of laughs. This repeated four times until my stomach was hurting so much that I couldn't breathe.

"Okay, now seriously, we need to find our way back," I declared, taking lead.

The mud was soft, and it was getting easier to sink my feet in it and difficult by the second to walk further.

"Can you feel how soft the ground we're walking on is?" I asked.

"No. My foot's busted."

"What about the other one?"

She was silent for a moment, and I stopped walking—it was getting too difficult anyway—and turned around.

Meera seemed to be in a thought until she shook her head. "The other one's numb, too."

"How are you walking then?"

She looked down at her feet, then shrugged. "I don't know."

"You're an idiot." I chuckled, staring up at her.

"Maybe. But, Becks." She narrowed her eyes in thought. "Why are you shrinking?"

"Me? I'm not the one shrinking. You're the one turning into a giant—whoa!" The ground beneath my feet suddenly crumbled, making them betray me. While my feet slid backward, my upper body fell forward, and I was sliding somewhere behind me.

My knees touched the ground, and I desperately tried to hold onto something but it all happened too quickly.

"Becks!" Meera screamed, and I shut my eyes, waiting to fall off what seemed like the edge of a cliff, but just then, I stopped.

It took me a few moments to register what had happened. I'd been unknowingly walking on loose ground at the edge of a small cliff, and it had given away just enough to put me on a slippery, muddy decline. One wrong move, and I'd be tumbling down in the...water?

I squinted my eyes in the dark to see what was below. About seven feet below me, there appeared to be some very muddy ground and traces of water.

"Becks, shit! Are you still sliding?"

I looked up at Meera. She was leaning over the decline, a look of sheer panic sitting on her face.

"No, I feel pretty stable. Get back, or you're gonna fall and send us both tumbling down on that nasty mud. I don't wanna ruin my clothes."

Her wide eyes fell on my face. "Seriously? That's what you're worried about? They're already ruined."

I was on all fours, and I carefully lowered my head to get a peek at my clothes. Damn! They were ruined.

"Well, shit."

I looked up at her, finding her panic slowly rising.

A moment passed, and I burst out laughing.

And so did she.

She laughed so hard that she had to lean against the tree behind her to hold herself together.

"Oh my God, Becks." She took a step forward, extending her hand. "Give me your hand."

"I don't think so."

"Becks." She laughed harder. "You're gonna fall."

"Probably."

"Give me your fucking hand, bitch." She was practically wheezing, so I finally extended my hand up but we were too far.

"I might as well just jump and land on my feet instead of risking the fall. It doesn't look that high," I shouted.

"Then what? How are you gonna get back up? We can't even tell if there's water or not, or if it's muddy enough to cushion the fall."

"Right. Glad one of us can think clearly."

I looked back, and I could've sworn that I'd just slid back another inch. I snapped my head forward and shut my eyes tightly, going completely rigid.

"Oh boy!" Meera breathed out. "This is not good. Not good. I have a small arm. You have a small arm. We need bigger arms."

"Or a rope."

"Rope! Yes." She leaned against the tree and scratched her head. "Where am I gonna get a rope?"

"I don't know." I brought my hand up and sunk it in the mud to try to get a grip, but it was very soft. I scrunched my nose at the dirt. "Ew! This is gross. Get me out."

"How?" Suddenly, the panic was back in her eyes. "How?"

"I don't know. Get help."

"I don't even know how to get back."

We stared into each other's eyes and—

We burst out laughing again.

"Stop laughing," she said, still laughing. "You'll slide back faster with all that shaking."

"I know. Shit."

"Stay still. I'm gonna go get help."

She tried to sprint but ended up putting too much pressure on her foot and groaned.

"Careful," I called after her.

"I'll be right back," she slurred, but despite that, I could hear the fear in her voice. "Hang in there."

"Sure, no problem." I gave her a thumbs up as she limped back in a hilarious panic. Once she was completely out of my sight, I touched the mud again and looked back.

One...

Two...

I started counting seconds until her return, wondering if she'd passed out in the woods somewhere or actually found help.

Another inch. Fuck.

I hummed the tune of Harry Potter and suddenly freaked out over the thought of dementors circling somewhere below me.

Looking around in the dark, I realized I was alone, and the possibility that no one was coming to get me made me want to cry. Tears welled up in my eyes, and a single one trailed down my cheek. But I had hope. Someone was coming, I knew it.

"Meera," I shouted.

No response.

If only I could reach her in some way and know she was still—

My eyes widened. My phone! I frantically probed my jeans but couldn't find it. I screamed in frustration when I remembered that it was in my hands when I'd fallen. I'd probably dropped it up there.

A feeling of despair took over me. What if Meera had passed out before finding help? What if I'm dying tonight?

No! Just, no. Help is coming. I know it.

I shut my eyes and started singing baby shark. Happy thoughts. Happy thoughts, Becks.

"Baby shark do—"

"WHAT THE FUCK!"

The voice made my eyes snap open. Tears were blurring my vision so I wiped them off with the back of my muddy hand and looked up.

"Rebekah," his voice was edged with panic and despite the dark, his eyes were shining with the one emotion I'd never seen on him—fear.

"Matt?"

He took a hasty step forward and stumbled in the soft mud. "Fuck."

"Careful."

"Hold on." Looking around frantically, he moved back a few steps. I couldn't see him anymore but I could hear his rushed footsteps, assuring me that he wasn't leaving me hanging.

Then I heard some snapping and jumped with fear when something was thrown at me, sending me back another half an inch. It was a thick branch.

"Quick. Grab it!"

I looked up to find him holding the other end of it, ready to pull me up.

I almost grabbed it. Keyword: almost.

"Wait a minute." I frowned at him. "I don't need your help."

"What?" he spat ridiculously.

"You think you'll walk away from me like that and I'll accept your help when I'm in a life-threatening situation just because I'm desperate? Think again, Matthew."

The last bit of emotion left his face and it just turned into a blank slate as he stared at me.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me."

"I am not. This is not the situation to kid—" I gasped loudly when the mud under me slid me back further and as if by reflex, my hands closed around the branch.

"Fuck, Rebekah," he snarled.

My breathing was heavy as I gaped up at him. His eyes were wide and when he realized I was stable again, his shut them for a moment to gain composure and in the very next moment, he was calm.

"How about we save that fight for later? Once you come out of this without breaking any bones or cracking your skull, you know? How does that sound?"

"Sounds smart." I nodded fiercely, holding the ragged branch tightly, then letting go with a frown in an instant. "It's very spiky."

There went his composure again.

"For fuck's sake, just grab it!" he hollered.

I took a hold of it and felt him pull but I couldn't keep my grip because it pricked my skin. I felt it slip past my hands, leaving several small cuts. I'd barely moved. The mud was keeping me hostage.

"I don't think the mud monster's gonna let me go." I shook my head.

"Rebekah, dammit—" he stopped abruptly, eyes running over my face and slowly, he loosened the grip on the branch just a bit and let out a chuckle. "Just what I thought. Never mind."

"Huh?"

"Honestly, I saw that coming. You can put up a brave front all the time, but if it's fake, it has to come off sooner or later. That's what a situation like this does, Becks."

"What do you mean?"

"Weak," he spat. "You're weak."

I went still.

"What did you say?"

"I knew you couldn't hold on to the branch for long but I still had to give it a shot. What a waste though."

His words hammered me back to reality like a throbbing headache from a hangover.

"How dare you? I'll show you weak, Williams. Give me that stupid branch."

I wrapped my hands around it. I didn't care if it was rough enough to hurt my fingers. I didn't care if I was nearly passed out, if I couldn't breathe or couldn't feel my legs anymore.

I didn't have my senses working but I put my entire strength and focus in keeping my hands around the damn branch.

I felt the mud under me move. Or maybe it was me moving. I was slowly being pulled up. Just as the thought of using my legs to climb up crossed my mind, I stopped moving and the strain on my arms from being pulled was gone.

I wasn't vertical anymore or on the verge of falling. The soft mud under my hands was replaced by solid, stable ground. I sighed in relief. I was safe. And free to move any way I wanted.

But the freedom didn't last long. Because no sooner had I made it back to the land than I felt something wrap around me.

It was a pair of arms. My enemy's arms. They locked around my waist and my back came in contact with his chest as he pulled us back to safety. We both fell back, his body cushioning the fall for mine. His breathing was fast and heavy, but I could tell it wasn't all from pulling me up. I could sense relief rolling off of him.

Either way, I'd tired him after all. Weak, he was calling me?

"You're fine," he whispered. His mouth was very close to my ear, and I found myself relishing in the comfort of his voice.

I finally opened my eyes and looked down at his arms around me. I was drenched in mud from neck to toe, and now his clothes were dirty too.

When I shifted, he loosened his arms a little, giving me just enough space to turn a fraction and look at him. His panic had ceased but had left its trails in his brown eyes as they desperately ran across my face.

"You're okay," he muttered, more to himself.

"I am," I whispered, a little taken aback to see him vulnerable for once. "And I wasn't even scared. You wanna know why?"

A hint of bafflement flashed in his eyes.

"I'll tell you. But first you have to tell me something."

He gave a silent nod, urging me to go on.

"How is it that I just knew that you, of all people, were gonna come and get me?"

His Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed, his gaze travelling from my eyes to my lips.

"That is why I wasn't scared," I told him and finally shut my eyes from exhaustion and leaned my head against his shoulder.

We stayed like that for a few moments until I felt a tug on my hands and opened my eyes. I was still holding onto the branch tightly, and Matt was pulling it from me.

"You can let go now," he said.

I stared down at my hands. "I'm not weak."

"I know." He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, and I leaned into his touch. I felt another tug and let go of the branch, watching as he tossed it away from us.

He flipped my hands over so my palms were facing upwards. His fingers brushed over them, and I flinched, finally looking at the little scratches.

Without wasting any time, he pushed himself off the ground and pulled me up with him. I could barely move. My legs felt like stone. So, I leaned into him for support.

"I can't walk."

"I know."

He hauled me up in his arms and started walking. Relishing in the warmth of his body, I shut my eyes.

But remembering about my best friend, another wave of panic washed over me, and I managed to open my eyes.

"No, wait! Meera. Where's Meera—"

"Parker's got her. She told us where you were right before she passed out."

"Oh." I sighed in relief. She was okay.

I leaned my head against his chest and listened to his heartbeat as he walked us back to the campsite. I got a hazy sight of the lake and knew that we were close.

"You should put me down now," I murmured. "I don't want people to see me like this."

"You mean, me carrying you? Or you drenched in mud?"

"Both." I placed my arm over my forehead in embarrassment.

He was silent for a moment, and all I could hear was the crunching of leaves under his shoes as he walked us back.

"I'll try to sneak around everyone. Just stay quiet."

"Thanks." I peeked one eye open and looked from under my arm. He went around the campsite and made it right into the building. Thankfully, the shower area was empty.

He pushed open a cubicle with his back and finally set me down. I took a moment to look around the little shower area and the shower head right above me.

"Am I going to shower?"

"Yes."

"I need fresh clothes." I looked down at the mess I was.

"I'll get them from your bag. Don't go anywhere."

"I won't. My tent's—"

"Fourth from the last, I know."

"Oh."

He left the cubicle, and I leaned against the door. When I realized I was getting the mud on it, I stopped leaning against it. I turned on the shower, feeling droplets hitting the top of my head as I cupped my hands to collect some water and splashed it on the door before wiping the mud off it.

Once done, I turned the water off and nodded at the door with approval.

After five minutes, the door creaked open, and Matt stepped back inside with a pair of maroon leggings and a white loose t-shirt. He propped it up on the little space in the upper right corner meant for clothes.

"No! I was saving these leggings for the bus ride back ho—" I stopped talking at his glare, then nodded. "These are fine. These are perfect, thank you very much."

"You're wel..."

He trailed off when I turned the shower knob and a stream of water drenched us both. "Wow, this feels nice. But I can't tell the temperature." I held up my fingers, watching the left-over mud wash off. "Is this cold or hot?"

I brought my fingers to Matt's clothes and started to wipe the mud away. My eyes trailed up to his neck, and I noticed some mud there, so I gently started rubbing it off with my thumb.

Realizing that he had been still as a stone and unusually silent, I stared up at his face. His eyes were fixed on mine, and something about them made me weak in the knees. I felt like going limp if it meant he would catch me, put his hands on me.

His hair was drenched already, and I lifted my hand to push it out of his forehead.

Water streamed down his face, down his lips, and they looked so tempting. I traced my index finger from his forehead to his nose, down to his lips and neck—just like I'd wanted to earlier—before finally resting my palm on his chest.

He took in a breath, his chest heaving up under my hand. He mumbled something incoherent under his breath. It sounded like 'definitely hot'.

"Why do I feel sloppier than I normally do while showering?" I wondered out loud.

"Your clothes are wet."

"Oh." My hands patted across my body to confirm it. Right. I was literally standing under the water in clothes.

"Nice observation, Williams." I flashed him a smile and reached for the hem of my t-shirt, peeling the material away from my body. Just as I'd started to lift it, his hands caught mine at the hem.

"Stop."

His eyes gave a glimpse of his inner struggle like he was enduring some kind of torture within. The sober me would've acted oblivious but the drunk me was a bad bitch.

"Aw!" Tilting my head, I stepped forward and cupped his cheek. "Are you flustered? Don't be. Wouldn't be the first time you see me in my underwear, right?"

His eyes darkened, and giving him a playful wink, I removed my t-shirt and threw it on the shelf carefully, away from the fresh clothes.

My hands travelled back to the hook of my bra, but just then, he leaped forward, pushing me back against the wall. His hands went behind me to stop mine and shield me against the cold tiles at the same time.

"Don't." His eyes held a warning. The stream of shower behind him was a striking contrast to the fire in his eyes.

If I didn't feel like I'd popped a dozen sleeping pills, I'd probably stretch the play, but I was exhausted. So, I only gave him a little nod. Something told me I'd be cursing myself the next day for just the t-shirt part. Best leave the bra on.

"Do you feel like you're gonna pass out?" he asked, swallowing.

"Not anytime soon, I think."

"Then you're gonna be okay by yourself." He took a step back so the stream of water was between us. No! Don't leave.

I stared down at my feet and nodded.

"I'll be waiting right outside. So do not lock the door."

"Okay."

"And if you ask me to come back in, make sure you're dressed."

Even in my drunken state, I could feel the embarrassment. But that was the best part about being drunk—you forget and move on easily.

The moment he was gone, I stripped and stepped under the water with a shrug, massaging the mud off me.

"Williams?" I heard a guy outside. "What happened to your clothes, man?"

There was a pause, and I wondered if Matt was in a mood lousy enough to completely ignore the guy.

Then I heard his monotone. "I fell in the lake."

"Oh shit, bro. Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I knew how to swim."

"That's good, good. You better get changed if you don't wanna catch a cold."

"Yeah."

"Alright then. Catch you later."

And then the guy walked away.

I dried myself off with my towel Matt had brought me. I noticed he'd also brought me my panties and a padded bra. Great! Now he'd been through my underwear stash as well.

Setting the bra aside with a blush, I only put on my panties and got into the clothes he had brought me.

"I'm done," I called.

"Are you dressed?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yes."

He opened the door, and I walked outside, holding up my bra.

"This is a padded bra. It's not meant to be worn at night." Then I said under my breath, "not that any bra is meant to be worn at night."

His eyes shifted from my bra to my chest, even though it was unintentional as he quickly brought them up to my eyes and said with a straight face, "I'll keep that in mind."

"And I was saving those nude panties for my white track pants. But thanks anyway."

I started to walk out, feeling him following after me in silence. About three feet from my destination, I nearly stumbled, but he placed a hand on my waist and guided me straight to my tent. Meera was already sleeping in a corner. Cheryl was probably still with Mack.

I fished out a polybag and shoved my dirty clothes in it, and stuffed it in my bag.

"What are you gonna do now?" I whispered to Matt.

"I'm gonna sleep. Just like you are." He pointed to the empty spot next to Meera.

"Who are you sharing with?" I asked, hoping I wouldn't get the answer I was thinking I was going to get.

"One of the guys. Maybe Chris."

"Okay." I nodded, stifling a satisfied smile. "You might get bored."

"I think I've had enough action for tonight." He probably realized all my exhaustion had been washed away with the shower, and I had no intention of going to sleep. So, he placed a hand on my shoulder and gave it a gentle push, so I was lying on my back on the floor next to Meera.

He draped a thin blanket over me. "You better not get out of that until morning."

"What if I have to use the bathroom?"

"Do you?"

"Not now. Maybe later."

"Will you be able to find your way to the building or end up in the lake instead?"

"Lake sounds nice," I whispered with a chuckle, but he didn't find any humour in that as he kept a straight face. I could've sworn I'd even felt his hand tighten around my arm a little.

"Give me a call. I don't care what time it is. If you have to go anywhere, just remember to give me a call."

I felt something flutter in my chest as I propped my head up on my palm resting on my elbow.

"What is that, Williams? Concern for me?" I asked sweetly, secretly hoping for a yes.

But he showed no humour again. He wasn't pissed either. He was just downright serious.

"It's not funny." His voice was soft. "You don't even realize what could have happened. You could've seriously hurt yourself out there."

"That sounds bad." I licked my lips in thought. "Would you have been sad?"

He assessed my face in silence, and then his eyes narrowed, and without an answer, he got up.

"Go to sleep, Rebekah."

I tucked my blanket under my chin as I watched him leave. Then I rolled on my back and sighed.